September 24, 2007

TV: CW Now; Online Nation (CW, Sunday 7/6; 7:30/6:30)

Let's deal with these in a single post, shall we? This is the laziest, cheapest, most cynical, most depressing hour of programming I've ever seen.

CW Now is a 30-minute festival of product placement in the guise of trend reporting. The show is so heavy on product placement that it only had one block of traditional commercials, at the very end of the show. The principal sponsors for the first episode were the Halo 3 video game -- it comes out Tuesday! Everyone's talking about it! Celebrities and everything! -- and Wal-Mart, which we were told was the best place to buy said game. There were also features on expensive spas, expensive clothes, expensive technology, and expensive vacations. Periodically, a caption would come on screen below one of the hosts: "Doesn't J. Boogie look great in that outfit? To find out where you can buy it, go to!"

Online Nation is 30 minutes of Internet videos, all of them chopped up into no more than 30- or 40-second bits, and all of them long since past their freshness date. C'mon, I mean, Mentos fountains? Really? That's the hottest thing you could come up with?

Each show has four incredibly annoying hosts, two boys and two girls, all of whom are Hip! Stylish! and Trendy! Four hosts each seems like overkill, but I suppose when hosts are the only actual expense you have, you can afford four of them.

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